BAR&ANKÁS BLOG

This night, on having come, it was doing here, sat in the ditch of the way, I have seen your old weak dog, have understood that the hour came and I neither will complain, nor will beg, will not try to break the agreement, you have fulfilled your part and I feel satisfied. Although there have no been many years, yes that have been intense and like that I prefer it, before a long life full of frustrations.

On having come to “The Three Forks”, the ambience was dense, they all were quiet after I entered the place. I believe that it was already known about my night visits to Florette, the wife of Ralph Forks,  the proprietor of the hovel, to which anger beams were already escaping from him in every look that was devoting itself and this one in the night has not taken eye from me. There is strange the sensation of knowing who your executioner will be. Es extraña la sensación de saber quien será tu verdugo.

We begin to touch, and in spite of the tension that was breathed between Ralph, the few ones that were knowing about the adultery and I, everything seemed normal. In fact on having finished the first pass, one of its friends offered me a bourbon bottle. I accepted it. Sonny Boy warned me that it should not drink. It had a bad prediction. I looked at him with a smile, purified a gulp and went with the bottle towards the large and rambling room that was doing the dressing room times. Now I need a little solitude, while I swallow myself this poison that it already begins making notice in my intestines. For the window of the dressing room I see the dog that looks at me while he rests on its rear paws patiently. La acepté. Sonny Boy me advirtió que no bebiera. Tenía un mal presagio. Le miré con una sonrisa, apuré un trago y me dirigí con la botella hacia la destartalada habitación que hacía las veces de camerino. Ahora necesito un poco de soledad, mientras me trago este veneno que ya empieza a hacerse notar en mis tripas. Por la ventana del camerino veo al perro que me mira mientras descansa sobre sus patas traseras pacientemente.

They warn me. I have to touch again, although I do not feel not good at all. I stagger towards the stage, they all look at me as if it was drunk, while the pain increases in me stomach and beginning to see it quite blurry. I try to tear a few notes with my guitar, the voice does not salt me. The guitar falls down of between my arms with noisy noise. With difficulty I go out from there, the fire raises from my belly my head and I cannot already think with clarity. I need fresh air. Me tambaleo hacia el escenario, todos me miran como si estuviese borracho, mientras el dolor se acrecienta en mí estomago y empiezo a verlo todo borroso. Intento rasgar unas notas con mi guitarra, la voz no me sale. La guitarra cae de entre mis brazos con estrepitoso ruido. A duras penas salgo de allí, el fuego sube desde mi vientre a mi cabeza y ya no puedo pensar con claridad. Necesito aire fresco.

I see the dog that looks at me and stands up going towards a dark way. I go after him doubled by the pain. I do not know during how long I will be able to follow him, I suppose that that does not matter. No sé durante cuanto tiempo podré seguirle, supongo que eso da igual.

I am cold, a lot of cold. A stream of warm vomiting makes way along my gullet. He would swear that that dark that went out of me was a blood … nothing matters already, calmly. Juraría que aquello oscuro que salió de mí era sangre… nada importa ya, tranquilo.

I penetrate for the way, I am thinking about hearing that someone calls me from the gambling den, he must be Sonny Boy … turn Myself and do to him a sign of that everything is fine, (now I want to be alone, friendly). I see as it enters again and I continue to my destination for the dark way, writhing.

I stumble over something, fall down rolling about a small hillock full of vegetation, try to get up, cannot, there is no force in me. All my aching body trembles violently and, strangely, I already do not feel pain. Only to the dog licking the face to me. Then, nothing. Solo al perro lamiéndome la cara. Luego, la nada.

I have just woken up, do not know how long have been asleep, finally I feel good. Nothing hurts me, I feel light and get up of the cold humid ground. On having joined, I see a bundle that must have been under me the whole moment. He is a dead person!, it is inflated, in decomposition … It Has the open eyes and a pain grimace. This suit … this hat that is fallen next to you, these features although disfigured I know them well … it is me who is. Al incorporarme veo un bulto que ha debido estar debajo de mí todo el rato. ¡Es un muerto!, está hinchado, en descomposición…Tiene los ojos abiertos y una mueca de dolor. Ese traje… ese sombrero que esta caído a su lado, esas facciones aunque desfiguradas las conozco bien… soy yo.

I take a some time observing my corpse and to the dog guarding it, guarding me, as always, with an infinite patience. There is strange the sensation of one himself being seen from the outside, as if it was different, an any stranger. That makes me understand many things that when it was in me it could not see. Eso me hace entender muchas cosas que cuando estaba en mí no podía ver.

I feel a twinge of tenderness and of sorrow for the boy of only twenty-seven years who died to the edge of one of these ways that it usually covered, while the effervescent emotions were growing in him thinking about what it would find at the end of each of them.

At the end of every way it always found a maternal breast that was giving him heat and shelter and a place where to bewitch the villagers with its music. And this itself was what finished with him, with me. These maternal breasts that often were foreign and this stolen honey of the honeycomb of another bee. Esos pechos maternales que a menudo eran ajenos y esa miel robada del panal de otra abeja.

In spite of being already a dispossession without life, I am still seen by good picture.

I hear steps, someone is rummaging for the vegetation, the dog flees and hides. To the moment I see going down for the hillock a local peasant, it takes a machete in the hand.

It sees my body, it does not seem that sees me next to you, because it turns on its steps and begins calling to voices: EEEEEEOOOOOOO!!! … It it shouts with a powerful voice in all directions. After a little bit other men begin to come: my friends. They seem to be tired. They approach my body with certain attitude of defeat and without saying a word. Willie takes an old blanket, with her it covers my corpse and sends the peasant in search of the police.!!… Lo grita con una voz potente en todas direcciones. Al cabo de un rato comienzan a acudir otros hombres: mis amigos. Parecen estar cansados. Se acercan a mi cuerpo con cierta actitud de derrota y sin decir una palabra. Willie lleva una manta vieja, con ella tapa mi cadáver y envía al campesino en busca de la policía.

When finally they come, Sonny Boy explains the circumstances of my death to them, three days of search and the suspicion of my murder. The poli limits himself to saying: "For whom does another black died in the way matter?, to take you this shit from here.”, llevaros esta mierda de aquí.”

With resignation they gather my body and leave without my soul.

And here I am, waiting not what. I enjoy throwing sticks to the dog, which seems already that he is not afraid of me. I suppose that you will have to come for me, or the dog will direct me to the hell, I do not know it … get bored and feel sleepy. He did not know that the dead persons could feel sleepy … I give in to him. Supongo que tendrás que venir a por mí, o el perro me dirigirá al infierno, no lo sé… Me aburro y tengo sueño. No sabía que los muertos pudieran tener sueño…Me abandono a él.

I am dreaming that I am in a field of very green lawn. There are many people here, they all are very rare ones. There are white persons and mixed blacks and it seems not to matter for them. To the fund I see an extraordinary stage full of strange machines. So many gathered people had never seen. After me, someone begins to laugh with laughter, I admit this laugh after the point and turn myself quickly, finally you have come. Hay blancos y negros mezclados y parece no importarles. Al fondo veo un escenario descomunal lleno de máquinas extrañas. Nunca había visto tanta gente reunida. Tras de mí, alguien comienza a reírse a carcajadas, reconozco esa risa al punto y me giro rápidamente, al fin has venido.

- Has it hurt great, black?

- very much gentleman, but it is something that was already representing me. - I answer You while I avoid to look straight at the eyes, do not know how I have to of treating you, although you do it in an informal way. It seems that you are capable of reading me the thought because the following thing that you said, it made me even more frozen of what already of for itself was. Parece que eres capaz de leerme el pensamiento porque lo siguiente que dijiste,  me dejó aún más helado de lo que ya de por sí estaba.

- I am only the Devil, black … leave you of ceremonies with me, keep them for God, if it is that you see him one day, that I doubt it. To him if it him usually be desirable that you appear with certain submission. - You were saying this, while you were looking around you, steeling the look and with a tone of voice that was denoting the deep rancor of repudiated son and with the broken heart.- Decías esto, mientras mirabas a tu alrededor, acerando la mirada y con un tono de voz  que denotaba el profundo rencor de hijo repudiado y con el corazón roto.

- I have brought you so far, because you must see this, before taking you definitely with me. In the end it turns out that yes you had talent, this that you are going to attend in no way is my work, not of nobody more that yours. You must know that we are in 1969, London … England … Europe … Debes saber que estamos en 1969, Londres… Inglaterra… Europa…

You had to of realizing that it did not understand absolutely anything because you stopped speaking and continued looking for yourself at my face of hallucinated with certain entertaining expression.

- yes, small Bob, the future … I see that you do not understand anything, you alone you limit yourself to observing.

And this is exactly what I do now. I do not know from which this one can go out sea of the strange people but yes I know that they all look at the same place, to that strange structure, to that exaggerated stage full of machines, where there are five ugly and tiny white girls clothes ligeritas: go with the future! Someone take rare guitars, without box and with a rope hanging, its sound is not less strange. Of me Legba had not warned that this was the future, it had confused it with the same hell Algunas llevan guitarras raras, sin caja y con una cuerda colgando, su sonido no es menos extraño. De no haberme advertido Legba que esto era el futuro, lo hubiese confundido con el mismo infierno

- a moment, I know these notes …: it is my “Love in Vain”! …: Five brats blanquitas touching my music? …: 32 years later? … Demons, this woman who badly sings, with this so serious voice and this so ugly face is destroying the song to me … Take me to the hell at once, Legba! ¿Cinco mocosas blanquitas tocando mi música?… ¿32 años después?… Demonios, esa mujer que mal canta, con esa voz tan grave y esa cara tan fea me está destrozando la canción… Llévame al infierno de una vez, Legba!

(Diabolical guffaw) - Boy, I see that you are not much espabilado … Believe that you will need more time to calibrate the importance that has had this magic of your hands. It is possible that in a distant future these “ugly white girls” tell you "they" … (Diabolical guffaw) … the importance of your blues …: Do you know?, they also visited a ways crossing … (Diabolical guffaw). ¿Sabes?, ellos también visitaron un cruce de caminos… (Diabólica risotada).

- That are they men? …: go with the future!

At this point, already I have lost the fear and begin to annoy him to questions.

- Is it true that you are the Devil and NOT … a devil?

- Arghhh!! … Mefistófeles, Beelzebub, Lucifer, Satan, Jaldabaoth, Samael, Legba … and I do not know of all the ways more you will have called me they all are one. I. Yo.

- … And you are black … - handyman mixing to equal parts, astonishment, pride and shyness.

(Diabolical guffaw) - East suit is alone for you, boy, and I will not use it any more. Although I like … it has certain style … By the way, this is another thing to which you will have to get accustomed, as you must learn to change your concept on the space and the time, have to get accustomed to without being a matter, as now, in fact we will be only an energy, without form, without color, without smell, without flavor and openly. As if we were done of … nothing. Como si estuviésemos hechos de… nada.

And this way we set off of between that human tide that to every step that we were giving seemed to be diluted in shades, as we. And for that dark footpath we go Legba and I, walking. The black and weak dog that wiggles the tail precedes us, determined and happily. If someone could have observed us, it would have seemed to him to see two friends going in animated chat if it was not because to every step that we were giving we were turning … into anything. El perro negro y  flaco que menea la cola nos precede, decidido y feliz. Si alguien nos hubiera podido observar, le hubiese parecido ver a dos amigos marchar en animada charla si no fuera porque a cada paso que dábamos nos íbamos convirtiendo… en nada.

Epilogue:

They count, which could have given the ear on the door of the hell to listen to the lamentations of the reprobates, that from August 16, 1938, from the hell there come sounds of the purest and genuine blues. They say that is the Devil who touches its guitar and sings its lamentations in solitude, lacking the happy days before falling down. But we know well, that he is Bob who sings, and is Bob who touches, because from this day Bob and the Devil are one. Pero nosotros sabemos bien, que es Bob quien canta, y es Bob quien toca, porque desde ese día Bob y el Diablo son uno.

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